What's New With You?

I'm just going to forewarn you that this posting is more of an informative post than anything else. It's something I'm personally dealing with, so I just thought I'd share. You never know who might stumble across this blog looking for answers; same as me.

It all started in Fall of 2008 and over dinner I realized I couldn't taste much of anything. Like I was eating with a burnt tongue. I'm one of those people that constantly burns their tongue on hot food because dang it, I'm hungry now and can't wait for it to cool off. So, I just thought it was one too many burnt tongues and I'd have to wait for my taste buds to come back. They never did.

I went to a couple different doctors who just looked at me funny; they didn't see anything physically wrong. But come on, it's not in my head, quit putting me off! One of them sent me in for a ton of bloodwork, about 15 tests. Everything came back normal except for my SSB Sjogren antibody. It should be below 1.0 and mine was 3.1. Neither of us really knew what that meant except that I needed to see an expert, in this case, a Rheumatologist. This could potentially be Sjogren's Syndrome (pronounced SHOW-grins).

What is Sjogren's Syndrome? It's an autoimmune disease that normally manifests itself as dry eyes, nose and mouth but can lead to other problems, such as nerve and kidney problems and sometimes Lymphoma. There are two types of Sjogren's, primary and secondary, mine would be primary which means it's not caused by another disorder, but exists on its own. And in doing my research, I've found that my Trigeminal Nerve (taste) has been affected and I've always had Raynaud's Phenomenon. Raynaud's isn't tied to Sjogrens, but those with primary can also have Raynaud's. This is a circulation thing and when my fingers are exposed to extreme cold, the top portion of all of my fingers turn white until I warm them up again and get the blood flowing. Honestly, I always thought that happened to everyone's fingers, but hey, you learn something new everyday.

So, I'm seeing a Rheumatologist next Wednesday and we'll see what she says. It's an appointment I've been putting off, mostly because I have to drive out to BFE to go (seriously, HMOs suck). But hopefully, if it is Sjogren's my regular doctor can help with treatment. I can't imagine making the drive out there on a regular basis.

So that's that. Sorry for the novel, but hey, maybe someone with similar symptoms will read this and find an answer. One in 70 people has Sjogren's and 95% of them are women.

"We're Sorry..."

"...the number you have dialed is no longer in service. But we hope you enjoyed it while it lasted. You are now being disconnected." (click)

Tonight, Jim and I watched the movie "Julie & Julia." A little bit on the long side, but completely relatable. Julie is nearing 30, stuck in a thankless job and wondering what she's done with her life. Well, I've already hit 30, I'm stuck in a thankless job and I too am wondering what I've done thus far. And then I want to smack her upside the head and say, "Well, Julie, I've one-upped you because try doing anything productive once you have kids." I can't even imagine the lobster fiasco with children in the room. "Mommy, what are you doing?" "Oh, I'm just stabbing this lobster in the head and throwing him into that boiling pot of hot water. Then we're going to eat him. Yum!"

Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but I really really really miss my freedom. It wasn't until a few years ago that I even figured out what I wanted to be when I grew up, but by then, we'd already had Peri, and dreams fell by the wayside. And oddly, with all of the technology we currently have to stay in touch, does anyone else feel busier and less connected? It seems like the easier we try to make things, the more we add to our plates and it's no wonder we feel overwhelmed. Now that everyone can get a hold of me anytime and anywhere, they do!

So that's where I am now. Feeling completely disconnected... from myself. I've piled enough on my plate that I'm too exhausted to do anything just for me. I keep thinking that perhaps with those few extra child free hours coming in the Fall, I'll finally be able to do something fun, but knowing me, it just means laundry will actually get folded instead of sitting in the basket for days.

Anyone else feeling a bit disconnected? What aren't you doing that you really wish you were? Do you still have dreams or have you given up? I just don't want to wake up in ten years, with a few more grays to keep my wrinkles company, and think "Damn, I missed the boat." *sigh* I truly am one of those people that believes I can do anything I want to do, but it would really help me out if someone wanted to donate any hours they aren't using and perhaps your extra energy too. Anything to help the cause would be much appreciated!

Ah, Valentine's Day...um...yeah

I couldn't have said it better myself. :oP

Valentine's Day is about remembering important people....
(inside) "Like Saint Valentine, who was arrested for marrying Christian couples in Rome. He was beaten with clubs, stoned, then beheaded outside the Flaminian Gate."
Card by NeatThings
Favorite Meal Greeting Card by howfab

(Inside) "This isn't working out."
Card by goatcards

"Love... is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it. - unknown"
Card by Earmark

Card by goodgosh
Sometimes the direct approach is best.

All Kinds of Cool Stuff

Lots of fun stuff going on!

I was recently featured in The Modern Handmade Child magazine with an interview and photos. Be cure to check it out! I'm fascinating. :oP



Winklepots was also lucky enough to be featured in an Etsy Storque article and email of featured finds over the weekend. That was pretty cool!


And since it's Monday, I'm over at The Mama Dramalogues doling out punishments to my 5 year old. Trust me, it's worth a visit. :o)
A Sign of Punishment